The highs, the lows, the maybe's, the damnits and the hell yeah's!

I wish I were 18.

Even though 22 has been my favourite age by far, I still can't help wanting to be 18, going back to a simpler time. Actually thinking, a simpler time would be, say 3, but that's kind of impractical. Not that this isn't, but still.

I would've done so many things differently.

For starters, I would've insisted on shifting to another city and living in a hostel, because right now I'm too spoilt and too used to home to be anywhere else. Put me in a deserted island and ask me what I'd take with me and the answer is an inflatable boat which would get me back home. Not Jude Law, not John Mayer. A boat.


I would've made an actual attempt at learning to play the guitar. I have a guitar. And. I cannot play it. Unless you count playing every song with the C, G, D chords, then yes. I am the next Hendrix. And don't say atleast you learnt that much. Its not much, not much at all.


No surprises here. I would have taken up a design course. I'm not an expert at any form of design right now, and I'm not saying that NID or NIFT would be laying out red carpets for me. But if I'd known then, that, computers aren't as cool as they're made out to be (no offense to anyone) (well actually, computers are pretty cool and I don't see myself without one, but I don't see myself sitting in front of one all the time, either), then I wouldn't have decided to go (settle) with engineering.


And, the crush I had on that 19 year old would seem anything but ick. I know. And, don't judge me. :-|


I would not have been a moody pain-in-the-ass. I was impossible back then. I got angry easily, fought with people for really stupid reasons (some of whom I'm still not speaking to) and got way too attached to people. Trust me, if you know me now, I'm much better. Yes, the mood swings used to be more frequent, longer in duration and none of them ended well. Note. I did not cry. Not then, not now. I was born with a heart of stone. I don't know how my friends were friends with me.


I would have, in capitals, bold and italics, THROWN, my cellphone off some mountain.


But now that I am 22, never lived in a hostel, an amateur at playing the guitar, an engineer (God, it still feels weird saying that), LESS moody and still with a cellphone, there are things I wouldn't dream of changing.


Staying home. Any other college's hostel would be OK. But the hostel in the college I studied in, big no-no. According to my friends, their warden was Hitler. No kidding.

Well, I didn't learn the guitar. But I can sing. Which doesn't change anything, but does make things slightly better, no? Yes.

Engineering. Ah, its a love-hate relationship, really. Hate the degree, hate the courses, hated the teachers, hated that they made us come to college on Sunday to compensate for some other suddenly-declared holiday, hated internals, hated externals, really HATED lab externals. But then, all the bunking, bitching, sleeping in classes, eating in classes, fighting for internal marks, fighting with teachers for everything, pretending to listen, doing anything but listening in class, drawing instead of taking notes, getting thrown out of class, going out after college, alcohol, that lake near college, NICE road, Dance dance Revolution. The list continues, and I'm going to mention just about everything I can remember. M's desserts, karting, being in a band, movies at Forum, Wii at R's place, sleepovers at K's place, sports day at S' place, messing up P's and B's place, and V's and D's and just about every alphabet's place, shopping for gifts, BIRTHDAYS, SURPRISES, TREATS, B.U, Gokarna, Udaipur, GOA, pulling everyone's legs, getting my legs pulled (sorry A, if you actually read this), everything! I'll miss it all, not the getting my legs pulled so much, but really I'll miss it all. And come to think about it, I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world!

Ah, that 19 year old. Someday when I'm 99 and he's 96, it'll hardly make a difference, yeah? (pathetic, pathetic)

And the moody bit. I think we can all agree (by we, I mean those of you who actually know me), I've gotten better over the 4 years. And if you expected more, screw you. You aren't perfect either. Yeah, the rude bit won't ever change, so get used to it.

As for the cellphone, prank calls and prank-messages kind of make up for it. :)




Oh. Lookie here. Turns out, I was fine all along.

Ode to a subject.

RIA oh, RIA.

What did we ever do to deserve such a cruel, torturous punishment? I bet the people of Iraq would much rather choose war over you! And the US citizens would gladly re-elect Bush again!


But, in less than 28 hours, you shall be gone! Be gone forever, taking with you, shit like AJAX, JavaScript and XML. Done with the weirdest variable names, declared to make our lives a living hell. A hundred ways to implement a simple array and an object, all so that you can finally say, 'this isn't the way its done anymore!' Huh, you think you are so funny. Well, I'd like to see you tomorrow after you get your well deserved ass-kicking. Wait for it, RIA, wait for it.

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words... HURT WORDS, HURT!!!

So, like I promised....

*like anyone cares*

But this my blog, so who cares about you!

RIA sucks,
Its worse than muck,
What horrible luck,
With this subject we are stuck!

Our teacher is a whor@,
No doubt, the biggest bore,
I'd like to pin her to the floor,
Sock it to her once, and then some more!!

AJAX, XML, Flex and SOAP,
That we can shift to DOS, we live in hope,
Or else before internals, again we'll mope,
As for externals, there's definite need of dope!

Stay tuned for more Innovatia.. Very soon, there will be another professor-dissing poem! This time, the RIA b*#@$!!






I dearly dearly hope she reads this.

Public opinion.

I wrote this in class today and couldn't wait to get back home to put it up!

This is about a prof in my college. If you think I'm mean, you obviously haven't met this woman. 

So lets do one thing, I give you all the opportunity to come up with a name for this post. The worst possible adjectives you use will be supremely appreciated. So, knock yourselves out!!  

So there's this bitch who we can't stand

We all think she is definitely a MAN!

She can't teach or speak English for nuts

She has the IQ of the dumbest mutt!

She comes to class and then decides

To define 'eeeediot', but we think she must commit suicide,

or just die, in every way we choose!

So finally, in her class, we can snooze!

Fuck-face, whore, illiterate bitch,

At all the boys in class she will letch!

Wearing to class only Kannada colors,

Whenever I see her, I just want to holler!

I can't wait to leave this place

So I can come back and slap her face

And hit her hard till she turns blue,

Then stick her face to the wall with super-glue!

Aleece and Baab, and 'ello', and 'saacket'

She should be put on an un-returnable rocket!

That explodes in space, and blows to bits!

What a f$%@-ing brainless git!

I wish she'd roll down a hill and die,

And out of sheer joy we'd cry

The world shall be a better place,

And we'll live happily to the end of our days!!

Man, that felt good!

You know what the worst feeling is? When you know your results are out and the f*!$ing website refuses to open! Screw you, VTU!

This is just to warn you that a lot of my future posts will be centered around the ogre of a university, VTU. Because, currently, thats what my life revolves around. Please bear.

Miles to go before I what?

They say these words found a place on our first Prime Minister, Jawaharlal Nehru's desk.

The woods are lovely, dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.
-Robert Frost

The poem, Stopping by the Woods on a Snowy Evening, from which these lines are taken, was taught to us in the 8th grade. The teacher who taught us English then,(Sigh, those were the days, when we actually had a subject called English!) greatly emphasized on these lines. We were greatly impressed, at least I was, by:
a. the poet's brilliance of using such simple words and turning them into something as effective as this.
b. the portrayal of the poet's determination and dedication.

Well, naive as I was, I thought to myself, wow! Now if he can think like that, so can I. And if I think like that, my life's going to be super-successful!

WRONG!

Now now, don't get me wrong. Those words still mean a great deal Its one of those things that hit you smack in the face, saying get up and do your thing! They still remain super inspiring and leave the reader staring into blank space for a few minutes after they're done absorbing the poem.

What happened then, you may ask.

Real simple. You can bet on my answer here, because its going to be that obvious. LIFE. Life happened.

And life being life couldn't let me mind my business. No no it couldn't. It had to bring into existence this monster named VTU. Stupid university. Stupid engineering. Stupid college. And this comes from one of the most positive people you could've ever met. No kidding!

What's the connection between the poem and VTU, you might ask. Everything, I say.

You see, when I read the poem, being a kid, it actually crossed my mind that I could apply this to my life. And I tried. And I did for quite sometime. Tried till it was possible. And then I couldn't anymore. Why? Simple, VTU again. There's something about VTU, it can't stand the sight of a happy student. It does everything it can to put you down. And then you decide, this isn't how its going to be. I'm better than this. I can beat this. I'll kick its a**! I'll start tomorrow.

Tomorrow??? Whatever happened to 'miles to go....'?

See the connection?

Now lets take a moment here while I think of an appropriate ending to this post.

Ah, I think I'll do it tomorrow!

Independence

4th July. American Independence Day. The day that spelt freedom for the American citizens. George Washington made President etc etc..

Well, there will be others too, celebrating freedom on the same day this year. 6th sem engineering students studying under VTU. For, on 4th July, the dreaded externals end!! All the studying, wasting time, tearing one's hair with desperation and the sort will finally pay off and we shall taste freedom! Sweet freedom, without a drop of blood!( that will be the case for the normal people I know. The not-so-normal people, believe me, I know a few, will resort to the usual cutting of body parts.) And it will mean much more to us, than any of the present day Americans, I can assure you, because for them, the day will be anticipated only because it is a national holiday. But for us, the ones who put in not-so-much hard work and not-so-much effort, it will be a day of celebration and gaiety!

Ok I think I went overboard there, but all I wanted to say was this!

I cant wait for the 4th of July!!!!

Is there a doctor in the House??

Flashback: The year, say 1992. I was five years old. That was a happy time. I was little. We all were. We could do whatever we wanted to and get away with it, almost all the time. Scribble on walls, eat mud(somehow I never did that, but I knew many kids who did), throw tantrums for things we wanted(that tactic still works, btw!).. Ok deviating there.. back to we were little.. There was this one question that almost all us kids were asked. 'What do you want to be when you grow up?' Well I'm all grown up now, and still can't answer that question. And obviously, I was smarter then, because each time I was asked the question, I gave a different answer! They almost covered every profession! There was one time I actually said 'teacher'. Talk about naivety! There was astronaut, geologist, rocket scientist.. Yes I know. I've come a long way. The two things I never said were a. doctor and b. engineer. Like they say, life has its way. Fastforward to the year 2008: Now 21 and I'm doing a four year course to actually become the latter. I still don't know why though. Till about five days earlier, if someone had asked me, 'Would you rather do medical,' my immediate answer would've been 'Are you mad? No way! 5 years study, then PG, then specialization, MD.... I'll be studying forever! No no no!' This was if someone asked me the question in the past five days! And then 'House' happened! No, no not your place of residence. The TV show! House M.D. What a stroke of brilliance! The show's protagonist Gregory House is a doctor, a combination of super-awesome, super-stubborn and super duper-intelligent! He's a diagnostician, who uses a method of trial-and-error to figure out whats wrong with his patients. His subordinates include a super-cute Aussie doctor, an African American doctor, who's always questioning House, and a woman, who's so frickin' sweet it makes you diabetic(I'm surprised that hasn't come up as a diagnosis yet!). Then there's the authoritative Dean(here, she's a woman!), House's complementing best friend, and recently introduced(recently, because, I only just started watching the show), the ex!

The show is excellent! I've always been terrified by the sight of blood, which is one of the reasons why becoming a doctor was out of question! But after watching House, I've started thinking maybe its not such a bad idea after all! The only medical-related show I've watched before this was Scrubs(which is also super-awesome btw!), and Scrubs is more of a comedy than a hospital show. House is very comparable to Dr. Cox, the bitter, arrogant doctor in Scrubs. But the shows are completely different, each being brilliant in its own way! And because of House, I now also want to start watching Grey's Anatomy. Yep, you guessed it. Another sitcom centered around a hospital!

I'm digressing again.. The feeling put across, in House, when a life is saved, makes you feel fuzzy! And mind you, I'm not much of a softie! And put yourself in the doctor's shoes, at the end of the episode, it makes you feel like God almost! Yeah they haven't found a cure for cancer in the show, but the they've cured almost everything else!

Too bad the show wasn't on three years ago, when I was at the brink of deciding what to do with my life. Well, nothing can be done now! Engineering rules!! *wink wink*

I need a concert!

Firstly, I need a life. Its post-midnight, I'm barely 3 days away from giving my GRE, and I have these bizarre thoughts in my head.

Secondly, I need a concert!

Some of you may think, oh, huh? We watch bands play live here every second day. Lame!! To you, I say lucky bitches! Because from where I come, concerts are a rare commodity. They happen roughly once a year. And very often, the few times that they do, happen to be the time our sadistic, pain-in-the-ass university decides to play the 'LETS SEE HOW MUCH YOU STUDENTS KNOW, a.k.a examinations' game with us! Sigh.

The last time a band played here was two months back. March metal mania, with Megadeth and Machinehead. Yes, I agree, thats not too bad. But considering, the bands did more growling than singing, and I'm not particularly a fan of human beings apeing Chewbacca, when they're supposed to be playing music, it can hardly be counted as a performance. Again this is my perspective.

Before this was Tiesto. The one thing i hate more than mosh pits and death metal is trance. Trance and hip-hop, to be specific. They're ok when you're really high and don't know what the hell is happening around you.. But to actually pay money and go watch some guy mix his music live, and that too in a different city, is something I'm just not interested in. Yep, you guessed right, I'm mighty hard to try to please.

Yawn. Sepultura. I'm not sure I even spelt that right. Bigger Yawn. Apparently they had an audience of 800. Speaks for the show.

The last good show I went for was Aerosmith. Which was more than nine months back. And before that I had a stroke of luck, and bands came to the city in sudden bursts. In a span of a year, there was Iron Maiden, Deep Purple, and Bryan Adams. Yes Bryan Adams. I'm sure he doesnt remember but I was one of the lucky few who got to hug him. And then almost immediately, get pushed away by security. Sigh..

Anyhoo..Life's too boring! Its been ages since I watched a 'good' band perform live! There have been rumors floating about Coldplay and Red Hot Chili Peppers coming to 'rock' the city, but sadly none of it seems to be true. Please God, please.. Make something happen! I need a concert!

The Grand Finale

Day 5. The end. Wednesday!

A very very intoxicated you asks, 'Internals? What are they again? BOTTOMS UP!'





The intoxication here, need not necessarily be alcohol induced. Three quarters of the time it is though! 'Hah alcoholics,' you say! Sigh!

No more, no more!

Tuesday - Aaaaaaarrrgggghhh!! Why on earth am I doing engineering!? Too much to handle!

Day 1, oops Day 3.

Monday.

You're up. Check the time. Oops you overslept!! Hurry hurry, run to the bathroom! Quickly there, brush your teeth! Wow! Record time! Snap it up! Quick Shower! Get dressed. Oh no no no, not just any underwear. Today you wear your lucky underwear! And lucky teeshirt and lucky jeans. Carry your lucky pen and wear your lucky socks too! Ok.. You're not hurrying up enough. Five quick gulps of milk and you're off! Oh but wait.. You run back! You didn't say your morning prayers! How could you forget? Especially today! You run out, with your mother yelling, ALL THE BEST!

Book open, you reach the bus stop. Find your usual seat in the bus and start frantically memorizing. Its funny how these last thirty minutes are the most effective! In thirty minutes, you're done with all those chapters which took you eons to just read! Oh and just in time. You're in the hellhole. With fifteen minutes to spare. You're still highly underconfident. So how've you prepared, people ask you. I'm screwed, you say, you? Yeah, we're pretty much in the same situation, they reply. Ok then, all the best, you say and enter class.

Hey! I know this stuff! One and a half hours pass quickly and you emerge looking quite pleased with yourself! How was it, they ask you. Not bad, not bad at all, you say. You sit there listening to the variety of answers people are giving on being asked the same question, and all you can
think of is how comfortable your bed will be when you get home.

NOk I'm home now. Yaawn. End of day 3. not quite the end though. It went better than expected, so I'm calling it a night. Quite literally.

Good night!

And then comes..

Day 2 - Sunday.

Today I'm studying for sure. Time to study. Wow, I'm all charged up, lets do some studying! These are your thoughts on the Sunday morning prior to the big bad I(nternals). But how can I start without my daily dose of the newspaper. So there goes a half hour, where you edaciously devour the sunday comics. And make the big big mistake of looking at the TV guide. SUNDAY BRUNCH WITH JIM MORRISON, it says! I cant miss this, you say to yourself, no, no, definitely not. So you quickly head back to your room, and get down with your books. Study continuously for 2 hours, so you wont feel guilty for watching the Doors frontman make a complete ass of himself in front of a million people. Don't get me wrong here, I absolutely love The Doors, and watching Jim Morrison live(on TV)is very very appealing! So coming back, you are studying.. You inform everyone you know about this Sunday treat on tv, who love you, and the same time hate you for it, because try as they may, there's no way they're going to miss this! So flip and turn the pages, looking impatiently at the clock. Come 10.45, and miraculously you're done.

I'm taking a break, you tell yourself and your mother. For how long, she asks. An hour or so, you reply, and then its time for serious studying! Unfortunately, the show lasts for a good 3 hours, and you cannot miss it! So you sing Love Me Two Times, and Light My Fire with your dad, listen to his comments about how he listened to such amazing music back then, ridicule him for not knowing the lyrics etc.. Oh by the way, next week its Freddie Mercury!

Then again time for lunch, and today being Sunday is your lets have my weekly looong nice shower day! So by the time you're done with lunch, its 3. While you're at it, you casually turn on the tv, to see that they're airing Friends! Which they do every Sunday. And which you've watched so many times that you practically know the dialogues by heart. But how can I miss Friends, I'll study later. Later comes, and goes. Why? Because you've fallen asleep on the couch! You finally wake up, look at the time and are horrified. What? This can't be! Why didn't you wake me up, you ask your mother? I tried everything, she says.

Now you're mortally terrified you're going to screw up tomorrow, so you run to your room, and send out I can't wait for Wednesday messages. Stifling a yawn, you open your book and get down to do the dirty work. 2 hours you've spent constructively with those huge books which can pass off as pillows. Dinner time again. Today you eat quickly and run back again! By this time , you're exhausted! Why? You've studied for 4 Hours!! Thats big! Thats all, you say to yourself, I cant do it anymore, I'll just write what I know. And you flop into bed.

There ends day 2. Not bad. Not bad at all. Quite constructive actually, if I might add.

The days leading to..

Internals.

Every month they come, bringing with them these various questions. No, I dont mean the questions we need to answer on paper, but those we try to answer in our heads! As we attempt to study those subjects which make absolutely no sense, we, at least I wonder just why I'm continuing to study this pathetic excuse for a degree. Every page I turn has a big fat WHY printed on it! I check my cell phone, I see messages from my friends reading, Lets quit this stupid degree, or, Lets ditch all the papers! Every person writing these horrendous internals are in the same state of mind.

5-day PMS.

Day 1 - Saturday. It seems like ages since you woke up at 9 a.m on a Saturday morning. Your stretches are unusually time consuming, and today, all of a sudden you decide to read the newspaper! You then go into your room, open your book, only to realize you have no clue as to what topics you have to study. You call a friend asking for the portions, and then again have a long discussion as to what you're doing with your life. You hang up, only to realize its nap time! Obviously, thats more important than studying. So yes, Snooze!

Wake up, and wow!! Its six!! Where did those hours go!? You drag yourself out of bed, check your messages. All of them read, I'm screwed, how much have you done!! You heave a sigh of relief, everyone seems to be on the same boat here. And again there, out of the ordinary, you take time out to go speak to your parents, discuss world issues, something you haven't done since.. ah well, saturday, last month. Then finally, when your mother asks, don't you have to study, you drag your sorry ass back to your room, flop on the bed, adjust your pillow so your studying position is comfortable and open your book(again!). You look around, suddenly observing things you've never seen before in your room.

You hear you mum yell, DINNER!! So soon, you ask yourself. You check your watch, its 9p.m! Wow, where did those hours go, you ask yourself again!

So you get up, grab some grub, and watch tv as you're doing so. You finish at 10p.m. Now you realize there's no point in studying today, might as well start afresh tomorrow! So there ends the supremely eventful day 1 of the 5 day PMS. See you on the dark side of the moon!